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LETTER: Parting thoughts with tongue firmly planted in cheek

Editor: As I part ways with the picturesque town of Canmore, I want to share some parting thoughts. Please bear with my twisted sense of humour. Firstly, a heartfelt thank you to the brave anti-TSMV’ers on the sunny side of the valley.

Editor: 

As I part ways with the picturesque town of Canmore, I want to share some parting thoughts. Please bear with my twisted sense of humour.

Firstly, a heartfelt thank you to the brave anti-TSMV’ers on the sunny side of the valley. Your ardent and vociferous concerns about the welfare of the animals around us have convinced me that I can no longer be a hypocrite and must leave the valley.

It is now clear to me that we cannot “engineer” our way out of providing clear and unfettered access to all the creatures who inhabit the valley, humans included.

Secondly, I am sorely disappointed to be leaving at a time of great change and innovation, courtesy of the visionary efforts of town council and town engineers and planners.

Of course, I speak of the re-imagining of traffic patterns over the Benchlands Trail bridge and intersection with Railway Ave, and Bow Valley Trail. The resulting traffic congestion has sent me back to my Ontario days in the Greater Toronto Area.

Ah, the smell of partially combusted gas and diesel from idling vehicles. I feel sorry for the occasional cyclist who has to share the aroma. They probably don’t appreciate it. Thankfully the pedestrians still have their well-worn path across Palliser Tail, through the field, over the highway, to TeePee Town, and can still avoid the problem.

Speaking of innovation, what about those pedestrian traffic circles. At last, we have a solution to the annoying problem of joggers having to stop for trains and traffic lights. They can now do laps while they wait.

Finally, a suggestion to solve the vehicular traffic problem for residents altogether, I propose closing all roads into town. Turn the valley floor into a tourist/commercial traffic only region.

Bulldoze all the buildings on the valley floor and create a giant parking lot for tourists and a dedicated wildlife only corridor. As for the businesses, or those still standing, relocate them up slope where residents can realistically access them virtually, or on foot, thus eliminating the need to own vehicles for local traffic, altogether.

A Safeway on the Benchlands playing field would be a good idea and perhaps a Sobeys at Quarry lake. The liquor stores, of course, will follow us wherever we go.

We should kick Canadian Tire out of town, as it was a bad idea from the get-go. When you think this through, Guy Turcotte’s idea of a gondola is beginning to make a lot of sense.

Dave Austin,

Canmore